Journal Ps 19-21 (all references are from the ESV; changes in punctuation are mine)
Scripture: “Who can discern his errors?
Declare me innocent from hidden faults. Keep back your servant also from presumptuous sins; let them not have dominion over me! Then I shall be blameless, and innocent of transgression.
Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.” Ps 19:12-14
Observation: Self-reflection is a necessary function of a Believer. The Psalmist is good to reveal what self-examination is all about…
Analysis: “Examine yourself!! To see whether you are in the faith…” Paul writes in 2 Cor 13:5.
These are not the statements of doubt they might sound like; something that is against Faith or being Faithful. These are the FAITHFUL statements of men that are PURSUING God with FERVENCY: “How am I doing, O Holy Spirit? Am I walking in Your ways? Do I fool myself into thinking everything is fine and dandy when actually I am not paying attention to Your whisper?”
I know that I stick my fingers in my ears (spiritually speaking) and go, “La la la…” many times in the day, caught up in my own ways, serving myself and my ego in crying that I am not getting what I want, etc. It might not be big things, but small things—but whatever the size, it is coming before worshipping God—they are the Idols of my Heart.
I look at what the Psalmist writes:
- Can I discern my own errors? If it were up to my discernment, there is no one cooler than me. That is why I need the Holy Spirit. 1 for HS, Zero for me.
- What about hidden faults? Am I asking for clarity from Jesus to reveal those “hidden faults?” As I mature in Christ, it is not increased boldness that is the key marker, it is being more aware of (deeper and hidden) Sin and the need for Grace in confession and repentance.
- Presumptuous (arrogant, insolent) sin: Those sins that I look over in myself, claiming Grace of Forgiveness, but not having a heart broken that I am committing these arrogant, insolent sins under the Blood.
Justification vs. Sanctification; God’s Sovereignty vs. Human Responsibility: These mess folk’s brains up. The first parts are all of God’s sovereign decision. Objectively, the Trinitarian God did the work to Justify the World (Creation). Man’s responsibility? To be aware of that Work (the Gospel) and to have hope and faith in it.
The other subjective responsibility of Man: To PURSUE the Trinitarian God all my days.
My whole head is sick: (Is 1:5— “…Why will you continue to rebel? The whole head is sick and the whole heart faint.” My thoughts corrupt: “…together they have become corrupt; there is none who does good, not even one.” (Ps 53:3)
These are the statements of God towards Israel, by extension the Church (c. the first few chapters of Revelation to verify). That is why preaching the Gospel to the face in the mirror, continually, constantly; savoring every fact, every nuance; discovering anew the depth of Christ’s work on the Cross for my behalf is the most important skill to DAILY cultivate from Day One to End of my Days.
Prayer: Oh, Lord: At the end of my days may I have been found to serve your purpose in this generation, in whatever degree I can.