Journal Ps 69 and 118 (all references are from the ESV; changes in punctuation are mine)

Scripture: “But as for me, my prayer is to you, O Lord.  At an acceptable time, O God, in the abundance of your steadfast love, answer me in your saving faithfulness.” Ps 69:13

“I shall not die, but I shall live, and recount the deeds of the Lord.”  Ps 118:17

Observation: Are these the scripture references that jumped out at me today?  Patience in affliction and being thankful through it?  Am I nuts?

Analysis: Yes, my wife says I am nuts.  Usually.  When even slightly pressed, gives me up.  I adore her for that while I cringe in embarrassment.  She is the sandpaper that God uses to rub off my sharp edges.

When I pray, I struggle with patience.  Asking God for answers to any situation and recognizing He may have a timeline that I don’t doesn’t always equal faithfulness in me.

Take, for example, work.  I like to see fruit of my labor recognized.  It is good to get a clap or two when something goes well or according to plan.

In prayer like the above it is: Laying burdens at the foot of the Cross, asking for relief or answers and then saying, “It is my pleasure to wait upon Your eventual decision.”  Hard to choke those words out of the throat.  After all I would really like to see answers by an accountable date.

Of course, I would.  I worship me, not God.

“Not my will, but Yours, O God” is not a throwaway line to conform to some sort of piety. David grasped that and held it fiercely.  How?  He understood that at the end, “I will recount the deeds of the Lord.”

Now, I need to look in the mirror.  I am not where David is.  Far from it.  But I have a target now to aim for.  If I am going to thoroughly embrace this attitude, cultivation is called for; plow my stony heart deep so that good, solid, fruit grows from it.

Rome wasn’t built in a day, neither will holiness be built in me in a day.  It is a lifetime of pursuing God.  Got a target, now…make a plan.

Hammer point: Recount the deeds of the Lord. Be intentional.

Prayer: Lord God, how awesome you are. Unfathomable is realizing your love toward me. This is a day of dragging my mind through minefields, trying to remember Your patient ways where I am involved.  So much to think about and what I want to do is bury my head in the sand.  At an acceptable time, answer me in your faithfulness, O God.  AMEN.